Boating for Jesus

You are the son of a son of a daughter of a son of a daughter of one of the PROTO DOGS, the AL KEBAB PROTO DOG to be precise. One day you are going about your usual life of spending all week earning the money required to buy copious amounts of alcoholic beverages in the hope that they make your life more interesting, but as it turns out, their effect tends to amplify your existing sorrows, but anyway, today you realise that in your veins is the blood of a PROTO DOG, and there is only one thing s...