

14 hours from now: Your thumbs mash the smooth buttons of your gamepad, as a bead of sweat drips down your forehead. The smell of pizza rolls burning fills the air. You fire a flurry of moos and herd five enemies together while narrowly dodging a bullet. One extra life left, the funky music steadies your breath and re-focuses you. You press the “slow-moo” button and perfectly position yourself to unleash a massive FART! The gas radiates outward and annihilates the enemies in a satisfying cascade...





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