Ultimate SPACEtime Future Crab

Please, sit down and get comfy as I, the text on screen, guide you through this meditation exercise. You are Crab. Herbert Crab. Born to 2 parents and 73.5 siblings (long story) you spend your days walking up and down the beach day after day. That is until one day you see a massive asteroid pasta strainer coming out of the sky. Instinctively your little crab self puts on this handy dandy contraption just to discover that its the Ultimate Space Time Contraption 3, a currently embargoed bit of Spa...